Monday, September 5, 2011

Pet Peeves

Everyone has them. I just have about 100. I don't really have pet FREAKING peeves, I just have a very bad tolerance level. 

Whether it's a freaking slow traffic jam when you're on your way to work (and you're running LATE because you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock), or when you're on your way to pick up you're kids. It could be a really, really  bad hair day, or when the internet is insanely slow and lagging like an old lady walking so damn slow ahead of you in the mall or the street. For me, oh boy, I have at least a hundred pet peeves I swear. Now, I probably won't have time to scavenge in my brain for all a hundred of them but here is my top ten list of annoyance from least annoyed to boiling mad.

10.  Wearing out a really good song on the radio/playing your favourite song repeatedly till you get so sick of it.
Example: Owlcity's Fireflies was popular to normal human folk long before it irked radio head's ears.

9. Chewing excessively loudly.
These lovely folks, God bless them don't  have dentures love, but their gums certainly have a mind of their own. Now, my sister SAYS I chew loudly, but as I CAN'T hear myself chew loudly when I eat my food, and I have never been told off EXCEPT by her, I beg to differ. Plus, she's a bit of a blonde.

 8. Not flushing the toilet/pee on the seat/leaving the seat up/people who squat on the toilet instead of sitting and think their BETTER then people who don't.
There are two boys in our home - my brother and father. They leave the seat up and my dad doesn't wipe his mess off the seat WHICH grosses me OUT - (if I use my parent's bathroom). Oh and did I mention that my sister doesn't flush after she pees? And my dad too? 
Once, someone did not even flush after number two.
So disgusting.

7. Being told to things a million times by your parents/being yelled at by your parents in front of your friends or getting THE FACE by them.
Now, I don't really know about you, but when my parents tend to tell me to do something - I REMEMBER.
Oh yes, 'rents we do remember. So why do you have nag us fifty million times to do ONE thing?
We know. We will do it. CHILL OUT. 
Also, so not cool being yelled out in front of your friends.

6. Being forced to do something - by your parents or siblings/ FEELING FAT.
Oh God, parents. Normally siblings force you do to something because they know something about you that if your parents knew about you would be burnt toast. (I have eaten burnt toast. It's not that great. Generally very bitter and black.)  But when your lovely parents FORCE you to do something, my God I don't know about you  but my whole body cramps up, and I start to stress. Because I normally can't do it or my body is going to be very ANGRY at me after I do it. (Like going out for dinner, AND COMING HOME SO FRICKEN LATE, THAT I HAVE A FRICKEN MAD FIT, AND CAN'T FRICKEN SLEEP) To digress a bit, my faithfully followers, I have a very big food intolerance, and lots of allergies. So there's only a certain amount of food I can eat. And my parents love to see me SUFFER and haul all that crap around just for their pleasure. I hope the sourness on my face is amusing to them.
Oh God, I hate restaurants.

Oh and did I mention that I hate how I look nowadays? Whenever I'm out I feel people see me like the picture below. The woman that is. However my hips/love handles look like the guy sometimes. I wonder if everyone sees me as a fat slump.
I didn't use to be like this.
Oh my lovely health problems, how I do adore you.

5. Talking during a movie.
The picture says it all doesn't it? Why can they just shut the hell up? After all we didn't pay 20 bucks to listen to them talk.  
4. Out of Toilet Paper.

I have never run out for number two, I ALWAYS CHECK. But for number one I have. Especially when I'm in a random McDonalds' and we're driving somewhere and I can't be bothered looking around for tissue paper. 

3. Repeating myself. 
When I repeat myself, I become more sarcastic with each repeat. 
Then I get in trouble for being rude.
HELLO! Deaf people.   (I'm not being inconsiderate for people who are born deaf or go deaf late on in life. That would be a very hard disability. This is for bogans who can't hear me talking because their too caught up in their own pathetic lives.)

2. Parental Reminders.

P: "Have you taken out the garbage?"

Me: "Look out your window."

P: "Dont give me lip, young lady."

P: "Don't forget to practise your piano."
"Dry the dishes."
"Have you dried the dishes yet?"
"Why haven't you taken out the clothes yet?"

"Have you did your homework?"

1. Going to bed LATE.
It's 9:30pm and you should already be in bed, but you ate dinner late and you're parents dragged you out to this bloody long restaurant an HOUR away from your house. And you're boiling mad.
This is my biggest pet peeve ever.

- - - - 

Regarding pet peeves, it is the opinion of many, that this is how this particular phrase was coined, "It's enough to make a nun swear."
Preach it, brother.

As always, its been fun. Thanks for listening to my rant and if you can be bothered please tell me what YOUR pet peeves are.
I know that in this opinion I'm not Just Another Girl for everyone hates at least something.

*Radio heads are people who only listen to the radio and only know the songs that play on the radio.

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